A few weeks after Mark and Mary Pasierb moved to Darien, Mary realized that the high point of her day was the arrival of the mailman.
“When we first moved in, I was ecstatic,” she recalls. “But then I stopped working because I was pregnant, and we were finally done with all the painting and the trips to Home Depot. Suddenly I realized that I was at home all day. And I was alone.”
Moving to a new town, even the fabled Camelot communities of lower Fairfield County, can be a lonely adventure: Whole families, torn from their familiar surroundings, stare wordlessly into the headlights of their new neighborhood. “It was great to have a real lawn, and Mark didn’t have to go sit in a closet to get some alone time,” Mary says. “But it was looking like a pretty solitary existence.”
As she recalls it now, Mary’s daughter, Caitlin, sleeps in another room. Three-month-old Andrew is swaying back and forth in a baby seat, dressed nattily in a fisherman’s sweater and tiny jeans. The house is dead silent. “In New York, you never felt alone,” she says. “If you were ever lonely, you could walk out onto Fifth Avenue and surround yourself with people, or take a ride on the subway. But in Darien, I had nobody to talk to. Dave the UPS guy was my new best friend.”
Lydee Conway, a longtime New Canaan resident and a Country Living real estate agent, says it’s easy to feel estranged when you move to a new town. “Especially in places like Weston and Easton or Redding that don’t have a concentrated downtown. At least in New Canaan and Darien, you can walk around and discover things, meet the merchants, see what’s going on.”
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